Satire$MUCRONSolana

MUCRON

Mes chers compatriotes. The president who listens to nobody finally has a coin of his own: fixed supply, adopted without a single vote, and 0.95% of every trade redistributed to holders in SOL.

Contract address · the only real one
3A3qjns31YZA6Ung91ZpoPD7J3p1bDFbTJ4ANFAPpump

I hear you. I will change nothing.

Mucron, the cartoon president, in front of a French flag, looking unimpressed Direct
Imanuel Mucron Président de la République de Mucronie
Allocution présidentielle20:00
$MUCRON$0.0000734 ▲ 26.6% FlashÉlysée confirms the president heard nothing MARKET CAP$69.9K FlashListening tour continues, now with extra armor LIQUIDITY$25.4K FlashRetirement age moved to “later” 24H VOLUME$62.6K FlashRedistribution works, economists baffled FlashStreet closed, job search postponed FlashCroissant supply remains stable

Programme présidentiel

Four promises. Two kept.

Every president runs on promises. Mucron tracked his, and stamped each one with its honest status.

  • Reporté · postponed

    Listen to the people

    A grand national listening tour, conducted from inside an armored vehicle for optimal acoustics.

  • Adopté · 49.3 · no vote

    Reform the pensions

    Passed without a vote under Article 49.3. Democracy, but faster.

  • Tenu · kept

    Redistribute the wealth

    0.95% of every trade is paid back to holders in SOL, in proportion to their bag, every few hours. The first redistribution in France that actually arrives.

  • Tenu · kept

    A coin nobody can print more of

    Mint authority revoked, freeze authority revoked, supply fixed. Checkable on-chain, unlike most promises.

Tokenomics

Signed by decree. Nobody voted.

Every article below was checked against the Solana blockchain. Don't trust the president: verify it on Solscan.

République de Mucronie · Journal officiel

Décret n° 2026-49.3 du 18 octobre 2026 relatif au $MUCRON

Le Président de la République de Mucronie,
Vu l'article 49.3,
Vu l'absence totale de débat,
Décrète :

Article 1Supply
952,445,620 MUCRON. Launched with 1,000,000,000; about 47.6 million have been burned since.
Article 2Mint
Revoked. Nobody can ever print more. Unlike the national debt.
Article 3Freeze
Revoked. No one can freeze your wallet. Not even him.
Article 4Tax
0% token tax. Nothing is skimmed from transfers. The only thing in France without a tax.
Article 5Redistribution
0.95% of every trade on PumpSwap goes back to holders in SOL, in proportion to their bag. pump.fun pays it out automatically every few hours; you don't claim anything. pump.fun sets the rate.
Article 6Metadata
Locked. Name, symbol and image can never be changed.
Article 7Chain
Solana. Born on pump.fun, trading on PumpSwap since 18 October 2026.

Fait à Paris, le 24 octobre 2026.Mint 3A3q…APpump · Token-2022

Le musée de la satire

Unofficial press photos

The Élysée photographer was unavailable. The community stepped in.

The listening tour. Armored, for better acoustics.
Café, croissant, gaz lacrymogène.
Curfew for under-15s. No exceptions.
The televised address everyone remembers.

Made a better one? The president won't see it, but we will.

Post it in the X Community

How to buy

The paperwork

Four steps. Shorter than any French administrative procedure in history.

FormulaireDemande d'acquisition de $MUCRON
Cerfa n° 49.3*01
  1. Get a Solana wallet

    Phantom, Solflare or Backpack. Write your recovery phrase on paper and never share it, not even with the president.

  2. Fund it with SOL

    Buy SOL on any exchange and send it to your wallet address.

  3. Swap SOL for $MUCRON

    Open Jupiter (fitting for a Jupiterian president) or pump.fun, paste the contract address and swap.

  4. Check the address, then hold

    The real contract ends in …FAPpump. Then hold, and listen to no one. He doesn't either.

Market

The numbers he won't listen to

Price$0.0000734
Market cap$69.9K
Liquidity$25.4K
24h volume$62.6K
24h change▲ 26.6%

Snapshot of 24 Oct 2026 · source: DEX Screener